The Importance of Failure

I know, no one likes to fail. I sure don't.

But failure is inevitable. If you have always succeeded so far, then you are either very lucky, or never done anything interesting and challenging.

Today, I was in a class: Introduction to Android Programming. Was quite new for me, since I have never done any client side work, so I was very excited. We all had laptops which were supposed to be pre-loaded with the environment we needed for development. We started with our first exercise, everything worked well for 2 people, and failed miserably for the rest. The errors were new for the instructor too. We all collectively tried to figure out what it was, googled the error, re-installed everything, got a new version...lots of different things were explored before we finally figured it all out.

It was frustrating, but in the end I thought it was interesting and quite rewarding. We found out a lot about the different things that need to be configured, all the options available, etc. We would not have if things had worked smoothly the first time.

Learnt two things from this:
1) Failures are useful, they are a good learning experience
2) Helping others in trouble helps us too. The two people who had everything running smoothly could easily have taken a coffee break, or jumped on their facebooks. But they helped. And they learnt!

In this example, failure was eventually corrected, and we reached our goal. This does not always happen. Some failures are minor, you can laugh about it, others are not...failing major exams, failing to get a good job, failing in a relationship. These hurt. Bad. But they also teach a very important lesson. You question why they had to happen. What's the purpose of it all? There is a big purpose. Teaching us to move on. Teaching us to be tough, to be brave and confident.

What do we do when we have such big failures?
Pick up the pieces. Pick up the pieces and make something out of what is left. There will be a lot of hard knocks in life, lots more pieces to gather and move on. But these pieces put together will make a beautiful mosaic of a life well lived. A flawless, uncracked piece of glass is hardly as interesting, right?


Life is beautiful, live it well. Taking failures in stride and making the best out of them is the biggest success you will ever have!

Lucky!?

The next time someone says "you are so lucky you are so fit", I am going to scream!
Lucky, my foot! Especially when they KNOW the effort, discipline, self-control and hard work that went into it!

Yeah, I am lucky that I actually decided to get fit! And that I DID something about it after deciding!

@#&^!%@!

Going to distribute warm clothing...

This is a post by a friend of mine living in Delhi. Excellent idea, needs very little organizing, and anyone that has a will can do it:


Hi there, we are planning to distribute blankets to the needy on the streets of Delhi. the plan is to buy as many blankets as we can, get out in a car at night and distribute the blankets to people who are on the streets. We don't need actual numbers to get going... we just know that there are hundreds and thousands on the dying of the chill while most of us chill out on new year's eve...

Here is his original post ... Going to distribute warm clothing (blankets)

I can laugh about it now :-)

Last night, I got quite a scare. I was doing some office work in the bedroom, hubby was in another room working on his stuff.

Suddenly I heard some noises outside, someone moving the trashcan around, and then running across the yard. I wondered why the hubby was out that late at night, and what was he throwing in the yard waste bin. And why was he running, I have never seen him run since the last 8 years I have known him! Oh well, whatever, people do strange things as they get older ;-)
I got back to work.

A few minutes later, the doorbell rings. Ok, so did he lock himself out too? No, that can't be!
Its pretty late at night, and no one ever visits before calling. So what's this? Hubby opened the door and there was a cop asking if he had heard someone run into our yard. He said yeah, he did. Cop said they were chasing someone and they think he ran this way. Could he look into our yard? We were more than happy, thankful, in fact, that he came to look.

He looked, found no one. I told him which direction I heard him running. Nothing there either. I told him I heard him doing something with the trashcan, maybe he put something in there? He looked, it was empty (it was garbage pickup day yesterday, so it was clean). He left and I was still scared. I went back to work, and soon forgot about it.

Around midnight, I was still awake, and wondering what exactly he was doing with the trashcan. There's a gate on the side, and right after you come in, the trash can is in a corner on the right. So it was not in his way. Then I realized and burst out laughing, waking up the poor, snoring hubby :-)

He had jumped the gate. I did not hear the gate opening. It opens with a loud creak, so I would not have missed it. He jumped over the gate and on the trash can :-) If only the bin was open, the cops would have got their man ;-) What a scene that would have been! These bins are big, and not easy to get out of!
The rogue was quite civil though. He fell on the trash can, the trash can toppled over, and he put it upright before he started to run away again. (I know this, because I heard it, all the while thinking the hubby was doing something in the yard). So very considerate :-)

The other thing that struck me...the thief quite happily jumped the gate, and ran wild in my yard. But the cop had to ring the bell and ask for permission. The irony of it all!

Oh well. Am glad I can laugh about it now :-)

Bah!

Life is so frustrating sometimes!
Please don't ask what happened.

Who'da thunk!

कभी हमने नहीं सोचा था,
ऐसा दिन भी आएगा

I would never, ever, not even in my wildest dreams, had imagined that I would cook SO well!
So much, that I prefer my cooking to anyone else's cooking. And I mean anyone!
Why is this such a surprise?
Because growing up, I hated anything related to food. Eating as well!
When I was a child, I refused to eat.
As a teenager, the thought of having to learn cooking literally brought tears into my eyes. I used to burn food simply so that I would not be asked to do it again! I thought cooking was for boring people.
When asked to help in the kitchen, I would have a genuine question as to why me? There are so many others! 3 elder sisters, mom, maid, they're all there. Why me?


Even now my family refuses to believe I cook.

But then, miracles do happen :-) I am glad this one did!

कभी हमने नहीं सोचा था
ऐसा दिन भी आएगा
पानी में आग लगेगी
पत्थर भी पिघल जायेगा
देखो...........
हमसे अच्छा कौन है ;-)

Bahut Sundar Hai!

After a long long long time today, I thought of this aunty we kids used to called "बहुत सुन्दर है!"
It has almost been decades since I thought of her, and I want to put down my thoughts about her before her memory fades away again...

I grew up in a small town in Maharashtra where my Dad had a forgings plant. We were one of the affluent families in town. This aunty was married to the tailor uncle who had a contract with our company to stitch uniforms for the workers. They used to live nearby, and aunty would come to visit my mom quite often. I never gave much thought to her then...just someone coming to see mom, and I actually used to get irritated sometimes too, because she used to talk a LOT! But today, don't know why, tailor aunty floated into my mind, and I realized what an awesome woman she was!

She was the daughter of a rich Marwadi family. Uncle was Maharashtrian, a tailor who rented a room in their house. The two fell in love and decided to get married. The rich family rejected the poor tailor, she insisted on marrying him and her family broke off all relations with her. I am not sure which town they were from, but they moved from there and settled in the same town as us. Uncle was a very quiet guy (I think aunty more than made up for that ;-)), strikingly handsome, very polite and nice. They had two sons making up the small family of Shakuntala, Shahuraj, Praful and Praveen.

They had a small home, one room (which doubled up as living room, bedroom, dining room, everything) and a kitchen. At the time we got introduced, the house didn't even have a toilet. I used to visit them quite often. Two main reasons: They subscribed to a children's magazine called "Chandoba". (Marathi version of "Chandamama" in Hindi). I loved to read it, so I used to go there. Sometimes aunty would let me take it home if it was getting too late, other times I would finish it off right there. The other reason was something she used to cook. Can't remember what it was, but everytime I went, she would make it for me.

Whenever she visited us, she used to talk to Mom about this and that, would admire anything new in our house (and there was something new all the time) and keep saying "बहुत सुन्दर है" for just about everything. Us kids would be really amused, thinking why is she admiring things all the time, and that's how she earned her nickname. She was genuine about whatever she said though. She would tell mom about her sister, who was married into another rich Marwadi family, and was the only one who still spoke to her. She only had good things to say about her. She spoke about uncle, how hard he works, and how good he is to her. Only had good things to say about him. She spoke about her kids, again, only good things. Both boys did not do well in studies, but all she said was, I know they try hard. They do their best.

What I didn't realize then, and do now, is her attitude towards life. She gave up a luxurious life to be with her husband who will probably never be able to provide her with what she left behind. Her love and commitment to him was so strong that she never once uttered anything in the vein of "because of him, I had to ....". Her love for her kids was so strong, she completely supported them in any which way she could, instead of comparing them with others who did better than them. Now that kind of love..the kind uncle and aunty shared, I think, is what epics are made of :-)

She knew how to be grateful for what she had, focus on the positive, instead of dwelling on what could have been, or what is missing. She had a lot of self-respect, enough to consider herself equal to my mother, and come visit her, and be friends with her. I must give credit to my mother too here...for not being snobbish like most others in her position were. Tailor aunty would call my mom "aunty" and seek advice on things related to the home and raising kids. Aunty, how should I go about doing this, what about that, what do you think of this, and so on. She never put herself across as a victim. Always upbeat, always positive, always willing to learn.

We moved out of that town and lost touch with her. I moved out of the country, and completely forgot about her. If I was near her, I bet I would go to her for advice like she went to my mom. I want her attitude, her dedication and commitment. I want to be sunshiny like her!

I should ask Mom if she heard anything about her lately. I hope she is doing well.

You are awesome, Aunty, and आप बहुत सुन्दर हो!

PS: They did build a toilet in their house while we were still there. It was a joyous occasion in their house :)